I know boats - 2
Posted: Sat Jan 14, 2012 2:42 pm
I am in the market for a boat upgrade and have been looking around for a month or so.
I had looked at several boats and had a test drive of one. Today was my turn to test drive another new one as a comparison
To protect the innocent, the names have been changed. The driver will be called Flipper
All else is legit as it happened. Remember, I wasn’t driving
Arrived at the dealers at the prearranged time. All the safety gear was loaded on board and off we wnet to East Arm ramp to launch the unit.
Did the usual checks and we were off. Warmed up the motor and went out thru the channel near the island
We were about 1.5 kms from the ramp I said it looks like it’s a bit bow high.
‘Driver’ said “It might just be the height of the motor. If it’s too high we just lower it a bit. Ill check it”
Me “How do you test that “
‘Driver’ “Just give it a hard turn and if it cavitates, it’s too high”
MC “Ok give it to her’ I grabbed the rails in anticipation
There was a small chop - nothing to write home about
The ‘Driver’ lowered the speed and did a tight turn, although not full lock – the side rail/chine dug in as we his a bit of chop.
The boat went up on its side and ‘Driver’ then turned further into the turn instead of correcting the ‘oversteer’
‘Fuggin Hell’ I thought. Fark.
As quick as a flash, ‘Driver’ went straight over the gunnel quickly followed by yours truly.
My swan dive was a 1 1/2 twist with 1/2 pike thrown in. Level of difficulty 8 out of 10
All happened seemingly in slow motion
We were both in the drink.
‘Driver’ bobbed up first and I followed soon after a few m away
‘Ohhh fu$@’ we both said in unison .
Next thing the boat roared back into life again, farted and cavitated till the prop got traction and quickly disappeared in a straight line into the distance.
I remember thinking to myself “gee, from this angle that thing rides really well ” then reality kicked it – Ah fugg, Im not in it!!!! Life jackets etc. are safely on board.
Ok we are now both alone in the water, in the middle of the harbour with the tide running out! I couldnt find anything with which to stab the former driver
So we decided to swim for a marker buoy around 500m away. Slowly treading water and aiming at the buoy but it was getting further away as the tide was taking us out
The former ‘Driver’ says “Fu$&, we’re not going to make it, I cant swim that far” he says.
Me “we’ll be ok, just tread water and the tide will take us close to the wharf” (all the time I’m shitting myself about the bitey/stingy/spikey things I've seen in the harbour)
Then I saw the boat (formerly occupied by 2 people) started to do a big turn and headed back towards us. I thought ‘that would be right, survived this only to be smashed by the boat and chopped up by the prop”
We saw a couple of boats around a km away but they kept going, oblivious to our plight.
After what seemed like hours (probably ½ hr), a boat loomed in the distance a boat was getting bigger and bigger. We could only see the splashes coming from the hull. My hat had floated when we went over.
We waved our hats around and then the new boat turned and headed directly towards us.
They picked us up and we went looking for the test boat.
Along the way, I asked how they knew to look for us. She told us that they were fishing away on a spot a few kms away and this ‘fugging lunatic was coming straight at us full noise”
The boss said to her hubby, geez I hope they turn soon. Then the boat went past them they could see there was no one on board so they started looking for the MOB,
After a short trip, we found the boat beached about 10 m out of the water up a mud beach.
They dropped us off with some water and headed back fishing.
‘Driver’ says sorry etc..
I said “oh that’s ok, it’s not your fault. Hang on, it was your fault” (just to make him feel good)
A big thanks to Duckey and Mrs Duckey for picking us up. (the driver owes you a few beers)
The tide was about an hr from dead low so we waited a few hrs for it to turn and give us some water under us.
Another boat came past and asked if we were ok. “Got any water” – they gave us a few litres and headed off. As they left they told us to keep away from water because there was a ‘fugging big croc’ just around the corner. He had smashed up their crab post and chased them while they were fishing, so they moved spots.
A few ph calls later (the driver's phone was still on the boat along with all of the other safety gear) the dealer came to our rescue and we managed to skull drag the stranded boat back into the water.
Absolutely no damage to the hull because it was still on the plane when it hit the mud/sand. It just left a small keel mark up the sand. Small ding on the prop was all that was visible
Finally got the boat going again and got to do my test drive -After 5 hrs in the harbour
I was back on dry land.
In 30 odd years of boating, I've never worn a lanyard cut off but this was a wake up
If the driver was wearing his lanyard, the boat would have stopped a few metres away and we could have climbed back on and kept going.
This could have ended entirely differently but I can laugh about it now
So - who wears a lanyard?
I had looked at several boats and had a test drive of one. Today was my turn to test drive another new one as a comparison
To protect the innocent, the names have been changed. The driver will be called Flipper
All else is legit as it happened. Remember, I wasn’t driving
Arrived at the dealers at the prearranged time. All the safety gear was loaded on board and off we wnet to East Arm ramp to launch the unit.
Did the usual checks and we were off. Warmed up the motor and went out thru the channel near the island
We were about 1.5 kms from the ramp I said it looks like it’s a bit bow high.
‘Driver’ said “It might just be the height of the motor. If it’s too high we just lower it a bit. Ill check it”
Me “How do you test that “
‘Driver’ “Just give it a hard turn and if it cavitates, it’s too high”
MC “Ok give it to her’ I grabbed the rails in anticipation
There was a small chop - nothing to write home about
The ‘Driver’ lowered the speed and did a tight turn, although not full lock – the side rail/chine dug in as we his a bit of chop.
The boat went up on its side and ‘Driver’ then turned further into the turn instead of correcting the ‘oversteer’
‘Fuggin Hell’ I thought. Fark.
As quick as a flash, ‘Driver’ went straight over the gunnel quickly followed by yours truly.
My swan dive was a 1 1/2 twist with 1/2 pike thrown in. Level of difficulty 8 out of 10
All happened seemingly in slow motion
We were both in the drink.
‘Driver’ bobbed up first and I followed soon after a few m away
‘Ohhh fu$@’ we both said in unison .
Next thing the boat roared back into life again, farted and cavitated till the prop got traction and quickly disappeared in a straight line into the distance.
I remember thinking to myself “gee, from this angle that thing rides really well ” then reality kicked it – Ah fugg, Im not in it!!!! Life jackets etc. are safely on board.
Ok we are now both alone in the water, in the middle of the harbour with the tide running out! I couldnt find anything with which to stab the former driver
So we decided to swim for a marker buoy around 500m away. Slowly treading water and aiming at the buoy but it was getting further away as the tide was taking us out
The former ‘Driver’ says “Fu$&, we’re not going to make it, I cant swim that far” he says.
Me “we’ll be ok, just tread water and the tide will take us close to the wharf” (all the time I’m shitting myself about the bitey/stingy/spikey things I've seen in the harbour)
Then I saw the boat (formerly occupied by 2 people) started to do a big turn and headed back towards us. I thought ‘that would be right, survived this only to be smashed by the boat and chopped up by the prop”
We saw a couple of boats around a km away but they kept going, oblivious to our plight.
After what seemed like hours (probably ½ hr), a boat loomed in the distance a boat was getting bigger and bigger. We could only see the splashes coming from the hull. My hat had floated when we went over.
We waved our hats around and then the new boat turned and headed directly towards us.
They picked us up and we went looking for the test boat.
Along the way, I asked how they knew to look for us. She told us that they were fishing away on a spot a few kms away and this ‘fugging lunatic was coming straight at us full noise”
The boss said to her hubby, geez I hope they turn soon. Then the boat went past them they could see there was no one on board so they started looking for the MOB,
After a short trip, we found the boat beached about 10 m out of the water up a mud beach.
They dropped us off with some water and headed back fishing.
‘Driver’ says sorry etc..
I said “oh that’s ok, it’s not your fault. Hang on, it was your fault” (just to make him feel good)
A big thanks to Duckey and Mrs Duckey for picking us up. (the driver owes you a few beers)
The tide was about an hr from dead low so we waited a few hrs for it to turn and give us some water under us.
Another boat came past and asked if we were ok. “Got any water” – they gave us a few litres and headed off. As they left they told us to keep away from water because there was a ‘fugging big croc’ just around the corner. He had smashed up their crab post and chased them while they were fishing, so they moved spots.
A few ph calls later (the driver's phone was still on the boat along with all of the other safety gear) the dealer came to our rescue and we managed to skull drag the stranded boat back into the water.
Absolutely no damage to the hull because it was still on the plane when it hit the mud/sand. It just left a small keel mark up the sand. Small ding on the prop was all that was visible
Finally got the boat going again and got to do my test drive -After 5 hrs in the harbour
I was back on dry land.
In 30 odd years of boating, I've never worn a lanyard cut off but this was a wake up
If the driver was wearing his lanyard, the boat would have stopped a few metres away and we could have climbed back on and kept going.
This could have ended entirely differently but I can laugh about it now
So - who wears a lanyard?