new topic : Suggestions

itsinmeblood · Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 2:56 am Post subject: new topic

need a topic called "I'm a doofus" for those times you make a complete goose of yourself
I'll gladly go first...,mate rings me at work last night whip out the phone do the finger swipey shyte to get it to go and start to yak
me.."mate this is a cr.p line I can hardly hear you"
mate "line is fine I can hear you clear as a bell"
me.."nope it sounds like you're down a well"
mate.."talk quieter you're blowing out my eardrums"
me..."hang on I'll go outside"
me...takes phone away from ear to open door
me...notices I've been holding phone upside down
tell mate and he wets himself
:jester:

ronje · Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 4:40 am Post subject: Re: new topic

Was in shed having a couple of nice cold beers, relaxing and attaching new tip runner to rod.

Couple of beers and could feel a slash coming on.

Had just super-glued tip when slash feeling became overwhelming.

No time to go to pisser so dashed outside shed forgetting about super=glue smeared on fingers.

Enjoyed a good slash and disaster struck! bl..dy super-glue on fingers and sensitive part of anatomy in garden beside shed!

Hpw do I explain this if neighbour sees?.

Luckily was only thin smears of glue and was simple to detach one part from other. Nothing like those news items u hear about somebody turning up at hospital emergency with serious problem.

Might have been simple but still brought a small tear to eye!

Laugh about it now and what a goose I was.

itsinmeblood · Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 1:53 pm Post subject: Re: new topic

Might have been simple but still brought a small tear to eye!

better than causing a small eye to tear
:rofl:

xray · Posted: Sun Jan 15, 2012 10:08 am Post subject: Re: new topic

grumpy · Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 11:40 am Post subject: Re: new topic

I know this has been on here before form some one else but I have to own up to doing it also.

Early one morning I pumped fuel into the rod holder which is right beside the fuel cap. :banghead:

Lucky for me I smelt it fairly quickly before I filled the whole bilge. :fu:

Ben Jam · Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 11:44 am Post subject: Re: new topic

Early one morning I pumped fuel into the rod holder which is right beside the fuel cap. :banghead:

Lucky for me I smelt it fairly quickly before I filled the whole bilge. :fu:

[/quote]

olfart · Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 3:23 pm Post subject: Re: new topic

stopped the other day to help young lass with bonnet up near coolalinga, big puddle of oil on the ground under car..apparently she tried to pour 5L of oil down the dipstick tube.. Her comment "now I know why the service costs so much, must take them ages to change the oil" was a total crack up. :rofl:

bit off the subject but farkin hilarious all the same.

Lats · Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 9:35 pm Post subject: Re: new topic

When I was young my best mate was doing casting practice because there was no fish so he just tied a ball sinker the size of a 10c piece on
the end of the line. When we were walking home he decided to find out how fast he could spin that sinker around in a circle above his head
like a helicopter... while walking along mind you.... all was going swimmingly until the said sinker hit the post of a stop sign. It flung back at warp
speed and dropped him... straight in the forehead. He had a golf ball on his forehead for ages

Holy cr.p it was funny. Got tears of laughter in my eyes now writing about it :rofl:

Kind of ironic that the sign said "STOP" too :rofl:

grumpy · Posted: Wed Jan 18, 2012 7:53 am Post subject: Re: new topic

Couple of mates were driving back from Katherine in their vehicles the other day when the guy driving the little Hyundi pulls off to the side of the road in a puff of smoke. :smoking:

Other mate stops his Hi-Lux a couple of minutes later and asks are you right? Hyundi driver says "have you got jumper leads the battery is flat she won't turn over" other mate says "yeh pull the bonnet latch". :idea:

Bonnet latch gets pulled and they look in to see cogs and bits and pieces everywhere old mate says 'jumper leads ain't gonar help here" :rofl:

They then drive of into the sunset with the busted nuts and bolts left on the side of the road waiting for a tilt tray. :rofl:

itsinmeblood · Posted: Wed Jan 18, 2012 12:05 pm Post subject: Re: new topic

when we were kids we used to holiday with the grandparents in Redcliffe, my brother and I would get dropped off at the big jetty there with 100lb handlines and a bag of squid and catch nothing but being on a jetty when you're 8 is good enough, anyway my bro gets his line all tangled up with a heap of cr.p line wrapped around a pylon and is hauling on it desperate to get his gear back when his 1oz sinker lets go and comes flying back at 2000 km/h and only stops when it's mushed one of his pills against his spine, he made a strangled squarrk sort of noise, crumpled over and did a 1.5 somersault into the water seemed a long way in the day but was in reality probably only 3 metres or so then he got all hacked up climbing a ladder covered in oysters to get back up
:rofl:

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