Dear Crazy-As-Bat-poop-Lady:
I am honored that you chose my ad for a mini fridge out of all the ads you could have chosen. It makes me feel good that my mini fridge will be supplying you with the ice cold beverages you’ve obviously become accustomed to.
Next time you answer one of my ads, please note the following:
1. I am not Home Depot. If you travel thirty minutes to pick up a bulky 40-pound object, please come prepared with the necessary items you’ll need to secure it to your vehicle. Yes, I have rope. I have a lot of rope. I have many different colors and sizes of rope. No, you can not have my rope. The ad said I was giving away a fridge, not a fridge with rope. Nor was I offering a fridge with padding so that the pleather seats on your piece of cr.p 89 ford pinto with no hub caps car don’t get marked up.
2. What part of ‘ must pick up’ in the ad was confusing to you? Yes, I have a vehicle. No, I don’t want to haul your fridge all the way to East BumbleFuck on the coldest day of the year. No, I’m really really sure I don’t want to do that. No, really. I’m sure.
3. Please call me only once with ALL your questions. I left for the day, and had 5 messages on my answering machine, the last one was at 11:30 pm. Frankly lady, you were sounding a bit too crazy by the end of the day. It’s a fridge. A small metal box that keeps poop cold. I don’t have the fridge’s family tree. For all I know the fridge’s was conceived by a slutty young Maytag that graced some hillbilly’s side porch. I don’t know the exact age of the fridge. I bought it a few years ago, I used it for a couple of months, ok, I lied, I used it a whole year. The fact is, you’re not buying a race horse, you’re buying a used fridge.
4. No, I will not throw in a couple bucks of gas money to pick it up because your anal retentive eyes picked up the ittiest, bittiest hairline scratch with a microscope so it wasnt completly described. I’m not making judgements on you, but I’m pretty damn sure Donald Trump didn’t send you across the state to pick up a used fridge for Trump Towers. Though I’d wager the whole concept of the mini-fridge bar is a familar one to you.
5. Yes, you can unplug a fridge without any harm to the fridge. Believe me, the fridge is fine. The manufacturers have figured out a way to extend the life of a fridge that has been unplugged. Yes, I’m absolutely sure of that. No, you did not have to leave 2 messages about your concerns with the fridge being unplugged, and frankly it was a little embarrassing having the same conversation with you in my driveway where my neighbors could hear.
6. No, I don’t have the operating instructions. I can write them down for you though: Plug fridge in. Open door. Put cr.p inside. Take cr.p out when it’s cold. Eat or drink cr.p.
7. I am not a fridge pimp. I don’t have any more fridges at that price.No i dont have one in a diffrent color to match your other appliances, No, I don’t know where you can get another fridge just like this one for your friend. Yes, I know it’s in great condition, and I’m sure you’d like your other crazy-as-bat-poop-mini-fridge-finding-friends to have one just like it, but this is all I have. Here’s a thought, there’s this online classified ads website. Yeah, you may have heard of it, it’s called CRAIGSLIST. I dunno, maybe, just maybe, in this great land of ours, there’s another mini-fridge being advertised there.
8. Please remove my phone number from your address book. I think our relationship is over. Oh, and if you’ve added me to your AIM Buddy List, please delete me. Please. I beg you.
Yours truly,
the guy that gave you the fridge
Location: jersey
it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Dear Crazy-As-Bat-Shit-Lady:
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- Jedi Seadog
- Posts: 414
- Joined: Mon Sep 14, 2009 9:06 pm
- Location: Brissie
- Contact:
Dear Crazy-As-Bat-Shit-Lady:
The gods do not deduct from man's allotted span the hours spent in fishing. ~Babylonian Proverb
Scholars have long known that fishing eventually turns men into philosophers. Unfortunately, it is almost impossible to buy decent tackle on a philosopher's salary. ~Patrick F. McManus
Scholars have long known that fishing eventually turns men into philosophers. Unfortunately, it is almost impossible to buy decent tackle on a philosopher's salary. ~Patrick F. McManus
- Sweaty
- Jedi Seadog
- Posts: 456
- Joined: Thu Oct 11, 2012 7:26 pm
Re: Dear Crazy-As-Bat-poop-Lady:
LOVE IT!!!!
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- Jedi Seadog
- Posts: 608
- Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 12:26 pm
- Location: palmerston
Re: Dear Crazy-As-Bat-poop-Lady:
GOLD !!!!
- Niglet
- Seadog
- Posts: 208
- Joined: Wed Apr 07, 2010 5:34 pm
- Contact:
Re: Dear Crazy-As-Bat-poop-Lady:
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
I think I have met this lady
I think I have met this lady
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- Platinum Member
- Posts: 169
- Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2012 12:54 pm
Re: Dear Crazy-As-Bat-poop-Lady:
hahahaha
love it
love it
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- Seadog
- Posts: 331
- Joined: Mon Sep 29, 2008 9:07 am
- Contact:
Re: Dear Crazy-As-Bat-poop-Lady:
Hahaha You should have invoiced her for your time, pain and suffering.
And it was free!
And it was free!
- ambush
- Platinum Member
- Posts: 112
- Joined: Fri May 03, 2013 12:05 pm
- Location: Howard Springs
Re: Dear Crazy-As-Bat-poop-Lady:
Anyone want to guess what nationality she was?
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