Today is white ribbon day, The day that men are asked to commit to never again being violent towards women. I have been asked three times today and once by text yesterday.

I believe this campaign is fundamentally flawed for several reasons.

1/ I have never in my life hit or purposely harmed a woman. I find it insulting and somewhat ironic that I would be asked to commit to not doing something again that I have never done.

2/ Why are we only concerned about violence towards women? Men are more likely statistically to be the victims of violence than women and the figures go crazy when we consider the number of men who have been sent away to die violently in wars. By saying we detest violence towrds women we are implicitly suggesting that violence towards men is okay. Why not a campaign that urges violent people to just stop being violent to all people?

3/ The campaign seeks to change the behaviour of violent men right? Lets say a violent man, not wishing to be ostracised and despised by his community, agrees to never be violent towards women again, commits to personal growth and learns to stop his violent behaviour. Next year, as a changed man, he is agian approached and asked to commit to not being violent towards women. Hang on...he thinks...I changed my behaviour and Im still being treated like a perpetrator....what was the point? The problem here is that the campaign assumes that all men are perpetrators of violence and need to change. So regardless of whether you are or are not a perpetrator, you will be treated like one. There is no incentive to come across to the other side......except the apppeal to your conscience...which if you had one would mean that already you are not a violent person.

This campaign appears to take the actions of a small percentage of violent men and tar all men with that brush. I dont believe that this is an effective strategy to stop the violence that is perpetrated on women.

A better approach might be to have a Blue Ribbon day. A day when all police (and I think they do a great job) commit to taking every domestic violence report seriously, investigate them fully, and lay charges where applicable. the words "warning" and "spoken to" should be taken out of the equation. If the decades of campaigns against domestic violence have not made a difference, a warning by police now will only reinforce the perpetrators belief that they can get away with it.

Then there should be a Black Ribbon day. A day when the judiciary (and I think they do a great job) commits to protecting AVO applicants from intimidation in the courts, putting meaningful AVO restrictions on perpetrators and following through with incarceration penalties for breaches of an AVO.

Then there should be a Green Ribbon day. A day when corrections commit to careful and considered parole conditions with an immediate return to the fulll judicial penalty at the merest whiff of a breach of those release conditions.

And finally......there should be a Pink Ribbon day. A day for women (who are after all the primary caregivers and therefore the primary socialisers in this society) to commit to raising children who have values that include respecting the rights of others to live a life that is free from violence.




Thoughts?

Couldnt agree more..

Mud, there is no place for people like you in the government of the Northern Territory or Australia. What you have written here is well thought out and makes a lot of sense.
I won't comment too much on the content because I have not been approached by the white ribbon brigade and have none of their literature, and I am not sufficiently engaged by the issue to search the web.
I will however note that your post relies heavily on the premise of men committing to never again being violent towards women. If this is indeed in their text that element is certainly significantly flawed and I find that offensive.
As for point 2, bit of a long bow but do tend to agree in principle.

You did ask for thoughts.....

Mud, on point 2, Saw Mrs olfart senior lay olfart senior out cold with a frypan one time...Still won't have a frypan in me house..bought mrs olfart an electric wok..by the time its unplugged ..I'm long gone. Totally agree with your post, reading it, I could hear the old bloke in me mind's ear, when I asked him why he just copped it sweet, 'no real man EVER hits a woman boy'. Just about sums it up i reckon.

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MUD
There are two sides to every story mate,I have never and never will hit a woman
Police do do a great job and if every woman out there were straight up and down your theories might hold water
But they are not and I have personally seen the AVO and DVO orders meant for being for protection( a shield ) being used as a sword to strike out at and destroy mens lives and livelihoods .
HELL HAVE NO FURY LIKE A WOMAN SCORNED
Therefore police should act on each case only on it's merits and I believe that most try to do that although I've met some that if you were in a bar and they acted the way they do you would knock them out (only in theory,I like my firearms license LOL)
There is good and bad in everything
I agree with the top half of your post
Probably the best piece of advice given to me when I was a little tacker is if you've done something wrong,stand up and take it on the chin
If it wasn't you ,scream long and loud eventually someone will hear you
Not having a go at you mate ,just putting some points out there

Have a great day
Shaun

Mud,
I think Days/ Events like this are more so designed to generate awareness of a topic and keeping it in the public eye, which can have endless benefits of varying description (Charity donations, normalisation etc).

I do agree and this particular campaign due to its nature would be quite difficult to "word" tactfully, also i'm not privy to exact statistics regarding domestic violence in the territory but the choice of colour for yesterday's "ribbon" could also be missconstrued.

I was at a seminar on white ribbon day last year. 2 blokes running the show vowed that they would never be violent against women and asked any males in the audience if we'd like to join their commitment. With the crowd 75% female, the few blokes just looked at each other and shook our heads. It was so blatantly fake and a simple ass kissing exercise that no one else stood up. For me, talk is cheap. Always has been, always will be. Real men act as role models for the sons and their mates by demonstrating how women should be respected. Fine, wear a white ribbon but don't ask someone to pledge they won't be violent against women. Any stooge can agree to that.

Yep...think and act upon your principes/ values....and lead by your actions....no PR department and publicity campaign is going to instil the basic value of respecting one other (regardless of gender, race, religion etc) in those who do not hold to that value.....and will be seen as artificial and shallow to those who do.

Great points everyone and thanks for taking the time to write them down.

How many white ribbons sold at the tent embassy do you reckon?

How many white ribbons sold at the tent embassy do you reckon?

Agreed

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Agreed

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Is smacking your female child tantamount to violence against women??

Until she attains the age of 18...No..You're forbidden to punish in any manner by Article 37 (a) of the Convention on the Rights of the Child.
Pretty much makes it illegal to discipline your child in any way other than talking in dulcet tones..Raising your voice is verbal assault.
Seeing this is the 'bible' blindly adhered to by FACS, and CPS..It's no wonder we have the current juvenile crime rate.

Got a first hand look at the way it operates.

Mrs olfart gave the young bloke a slap across the dial for swearing at her.
School principal rang CPS..Boy had handprint on his face.
Mrs Olfart charged with Assault occasioning Bodily Harm.
Put on a bond..no conviction recorded.
Cop apologised to Mrs Olfart, explaining that he had no room for discretionary action once a formal complaint was lodged.
His solution would have been to give boy a swift kick up the a**se, but that's against the law..Which in this case is definitely AN ASS.

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